Kevan Smith - Reign

A pub discussion

‘Up to my bloody armpits. It doesn’t bloody stop. Everywhere you look is his face. Just like his sister ole Horseface. He is everywhere! Since his mum finally dies – and thank Godfrey for that – he is on all things. I tell you what, I’m not going to lick the back of his head. It was bad inuff with his Gerry mum let alone his tree-hugging bald spotted noggin.’

‘Did you see that red pain thing? It looked like it had been defaced by protestors before it was finished?’

‘And his wife, the poor dear, she’s the “long suffering”. Fist his mum didn’t like her, so had her married off to his best friend army buddy (supposedly because she wasn’t blue enough), then he was forced to marry that pretty teenager. Another victim of ‘Mummyism’. That poor bugger had to put up with the wingnutted tree hugger for how many years?? Had two nice kids, well one of them has the brains of a rotten walnut but, you can’t help bad luck. Especially where you got dropped on your head a couple of times then made to join the air force when you’re afraid of flying. I mean, the silly sod married and soapy star, and an American to boot.

But, seriously you think he might have gotten the hint when his own mum wouldn’t let go of her pretty seat and was dragged out with her nails gouging the padded arms. You might have thought to step back and let the ball pass to the keeper so his not-so-silly son got the job BUT NO he stalked mummy even past her historical record of the longest lasting to get his chance of wearing the pretty hat and bath robes, even at this gentle age of 74. For Godfreys sake, let it go mate. End the Reign!