Ricci Schwarzler- Remembrance

The screaming, the blood, the pain, the sadness. I remember when I was young, only I never had all fun. I never had any fun. Basically, because I didn’t have any friends. I didn’t know how to make friends. I wasn’t allowed to play without the kids in the street. I’d watch their playing in the street, chasing balls, falling off bikes, laughing, crying, fighting. I longed to be out there with them. But mum and dad kept me inside. It was for my own good, I used to beg them to let me join them.

I remember them coming to the door and asking to play with me. Dad would say NO! He was firm, he was the boss. Mum tried to allow it but he controlled everything.

Today is my Remembrance Day. It’s 40 years since I sat at the window watching the kids play. It was like any other day. I begged to go out. I begged so much that Dad hit me. He knocked me across the room. Mum rushed in to help me. He pushed her away. She tried again. He screamed at her. She came at him with her fists. I cried. Dad punched her across the room. The bold was streaming from her face but she was up again, He did it again.

I ran for the door, it was open, I could get out. The kids were out there. They weren’t playing, they were starring at the house. I ran to them and screamed, “He’s killing my mum”. Some ran to their houses. Others stayed with me. The child with no friends. We started at the house. Then he appeared, steaming, red, screaming at me. At the 10-year-old child I was.

He stormed down to me. Grabbed me by my hair. Screamed inches from my face. I could feel his spit and hot breath all over my face. Other kids grabbed at him he pushed them away. He dropped me. We, all the kids were staring at him. He had his back to the road. We all saw the truck. We all thought as one. We ran at him as one. We pushed him in front of the truck. The End. Fini. He was no more.

It’s my Remembrance Day. Forty years on. We’re all at my place with my mum. All my friends from that day. Celebrating our mutual action. The big push.

Now Mum, my wife and I sit and look out the same window at our kids having fun. Laughing, crying and fighting, but best of all, having friends.